raindrops keep falling on my head ~~lalala~~
n anyway dis wkn got 958 event oso... den oso natas fair.. joanne n anna (my taiwan khakis) gg to e fair dis fri to chk out e korea packages... haizz.. i wanna go but dat time i asked my dad he say c first... den i dun dare ask till now.. (abt 1 wk plus le)how how how? althou he din say no right from e start but dis few days he not in a good mood so i dunno how to bring it up again.. haizz... last yr he let me go taiwan oredi v tou xiao liao haha... haizz.. if only i can find my diary key... u noe hor somehow my diary has dis magical power haha.. whatever thing i want from my dad i jus write in my diary n it will really come true... hahah... from things like i did badly den i dunno how to tell my dad... i rmb j2 block test 1 or isit 2.. cant rmb i got 2 Fs... n 1 O heehee cos i din study.. den mr wong v angry need to c parents.. den i wrote in my diary i dunno how to tell papa... den e nxt day papa told me he flying off again.. yeah so i told mr wong my daddy not in singapore... den mr wong cant wait cos deadline de.. haha.. den he asked if i had any guardian haha den i told him my nxt-of-kin is my sis haha who is 1 yr older than me only.. he almost fainted.. but somehow in e end my daddy dun need to go down oso haha i jus went to c e HOD myself haha.... n i kept e results slip so my dad dunno until today heehee...
anyway i want go korea!!! can evri one pray for me... haizz...
hafta ask b4 fri... still got 3 more nites to try... but dere is only one chance if i fail dis time i cant ask e nxt day or wad... cos my dad v fierce de.. haizz.. n if i spoil his mood dat's it...
anyway if can go korea... i will stop over at taipei again haha.. totally in love wif taipei.. n if possible dis time ard.. i shld b celebrating my bday in another country!! *keeping my fingers crossed* last yr spent christmas in kaohsiung wif eli anna n joanne heehee... so fun!!
k lar gotta do my tut liao sian~~!!
the princess left at
1:46 PM
Givers VS takers..
k anyway.. today i went for maf.. den i jus reached home..den i saw 2 "frens" whom i haf nv seen for god knows how many months... ever since my summer term psycho paper in smu.. at least e guy i met him once on e bus.. {but who cares abt him??!!} i m closer to e girl she used to b one of my bestest fren.. somehow today when i c them i dunno wad to say 最熟悉的陌生人 i finally understand e meaning of dis phrase..
BQ mayb u dunno y i m so tired... i dun deny i m someone who need lotsa assurance.. years ago i was e one who initiated dis friendship i got her number from a senior after we went for ccy camp den i started calling her up n we became e best of frens from den on... but throughout dis 3 yrs of frenship i m alwiz e one who will ring her up n tok cock n arrange for meet ups n stuff... even dis time i m gg back smu to find some frens i told her.. but too bad she wasn't free or mayb i jus not ready to c her oso.."i really miss u" dese 4 words v ez to say but actions speak louder than words... k anyway i m jus so tired dat y when she ask me when we can meet up.. let's fix a time.. i dun really wanna bother.. i m in a semi-gif-up state le i told her if she want she sms me... n i hope she gets e hint.. cos if she's not gg to do anything abt it.. dat's IT!! i m letting go of our friendship i m TIRED!!!!
k enuf of dis sad stuff.. today i went back hcjc for maf.. its e last hwa chong junior college event i guess... dunno after e merger will dere b any more mafs.. even today she went back for maf she nv tell me hmm mayb all of u will think huh expected de mah.. hmm not really cos if i m not wrong her 2 yrs in hc she nv went for maf den last yr we din go back tgt cos we went energy concert... haizz... look wad happened jus within a year..
vien i went to 73 class bench cos yanling was tokking to her fren.. k den i tokked to qinghui lorr.. haha dey say u nv go.. of cos la u not in sg.. k we miss u!! n haha guess who i saw.. i saw ur dear keith!! haha.. really a lot of memories.. e "u gave me a secondary sch life i will nv forget" haha...
den i reached home i chk my email i was v shocked to receive kaiwen's invitation to friendster.. i was v close to her in sec 1 n beginning of sec 2.. den she n rachel became v close den i became v close to shiya i think i cant rmb heehee.. den 2yrs in hcjc we nv really tok to each other oso... not only did she invite me she oso left me a msg asking how m i...hmm.. but i din reply cos i dunno wad to say.. i m tired... really tired...
jus now broke down finally... cos my dad ticked me off... sometimes i really feel bad talking back at him but i m jus too stressed.. i noe its difficult on his part to raise us... ever since mumm left us papa haf been v sad... he lost a soul mate, a good business partner.. a responsible housemaker... i miss mummy!!!
some ppl r blessed wif evrithing.. dey dun haf to do or say much friends will alwiz surround them...
some ppl no matter how hard dey try.... how hard dey try to please evri one ard dem... ultimately... dey demselves r not happy....
我真是失败！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！
the princess left at
4:01 PM
mixed feelings~~~
hey hey.. haben really decide who will b in my blog readers' list...
first lemme share wif u wad i read in e papers few days ago..
dis 14-yr-old wrote.....
sometimes i feel lonely,
like i m in the world for no purpose.
it's like i haf frens but u nv know whether they r true to u.
i m afraid that i will do something wrong,
i will make people hate me, be angry wif me.
yeah. evribody says dat we shld b ourselves,
but frequently,
i don't haf e confidence,
to just live life like what i want,
but rather most of e time,
i m jus living what people want to see.
maybe it's not their fault.
maybe it's jus dat i dun haf e courage to face challenges...
to take risks....
u noe when i first read dis... i m really appalled its written by a 14-yr-old signing off as lost soul..
hmmm how many times haf i felt e same way.. i haf lost count...
even like e recent thumb drive incident dat i haf been telling u abt... hmmm... mayb a lot of u r wondering y i dowan b harsh on him n demand my thumb back... or wad... hmm dat's bcos i really hate to make a wrong step as dat wld spell the end of our friendship... i think i haf told some of u.. dat working in maybank wif my bunch of temp temp was one of my happiest times in life.. dey really brought me joy n laughter n i treasure dis friendship a lot a lot.... i dowan dis incident to strain our friendship i dowan him to think dat i m irritating or hate me...
in my 19 yrs of life.. i haf lost a lot of close friends along e way.. i m v upset... n how i wished i cld turn back time i wld haf done all i could to salvage e situation.. as such e huimin now somehow dun really noe the way to be fierce to my frens... i will only keep quiet or complain abt it to my frens..
how many times do we actually find e courage to admit our mistakes.. to find a way out.. to lead e kind of life we want without ppl's dictation.... making the choice to come to ntu.. starting uni life again as a yr 1 freshie... u all really think i haf taken evri thing in my stride?? NO!! some of e ignorant people ard me hafta make life difficult for me... but i strongly believe all these obstacles are there to challenge me n make me a better person... thou i m really tired at times....
the princess left at
4:54 PM
